Last week I emailed you about why mindset is everything…
…for you as a coach…
…for your clients…
…and for your coaching business.
The point was that helping your clients manage their state of mind…
…is 80% of coaching.
How is this ‘state of mind’ defined?
It’s a “constellation” of:
Your thoughts about what is happening at the moment.
Alter one star…
…and you change the entire constellation.
What happens if you are tired and drink a cup of coffee?
Caffeine stimulates your brain…
…which makes you feel more alert.
So, in that case your physiology (biochemistry) changed your thoughts.
But what if you’re drinking decaf and don’t know it?
Can you feel more alert because you believe you’re consuming caffeine?
That’s because your thoughts and beliefs can powerfully change your physiology.
I was having trouble sleeping, so I called a friend.
“Just tell yourself to go to sleep.”
“Just say to myself, ‘Go to sleep’?”
It sounded ridiculous.
But that night I tried it…
…only half believing it would work.
After telling myself, “Go to sleep” about 5 times…
…in a kind and loving manner…
…I woke up the next morning.
My thoughts had radically changed my physiology.
…and you alter the entire constellation of your state of mind.
…and you change them all.
Here’s HOW it works, and how to use it with your clients.
1. Identify what your client wants to accomplish.
This can be something they want to achieve, to feel, or to become.
2. Identify what is holding them back from achieving what they want.
This is hard for most clients, as our first knee-jerk reaction is to think of some external obstacle. Although some external things might seem to be stopping your client, concentrating on that just puts them in victim mode.
Instead, look for something INSIDE YOUR CLIENT that is stopping them…
For example, is it…
Is it something permanent, or can it be changed? (Hint: Realizing it can be changed will help your client transition to the next step.)
3. Decide how your client will change their state.
Change their thoughts?
The point was that helping your clients manage their state of mind…is 80% of coaching.”
Change their beliefs?
Change their physiology?
4. Get them to DO IT…
Simple enough, but it needs saying.
Knowing and doing are two different things.
Tell your client to actually make these changes (ideally DURING their coaching session!).
Acknowledge your client for overcoming the obstacle, and support them in determining what is possible from this new perspective.
Ask your client,
“Who are you becoming that allowed you to make the change?”
That’s it. Five steps and you’re done.
I can do these 5 steps in a 30 minute coaching session with time to spare.
As you practice this with your clients…
…in different situations…
…it will get easier.
…and how to get the mind and body to perform in a peak state of mind.
And that is 80% of accomplishing anything you want to achieve…
…and your clients.
Colette “Coaching Your Constellation” Coiner
Writer, Coaches Training Blog community